What Now Woman

aI am a woman small enough
Beneath the half-thousand moons I've seen
To think on if I've ever been
Present
To what I was meant to be.
Yet, I'm large enough in years from youth
To stand strong in a larger truth
This is what I have. This is what I see:

I am a woman with promises kept
When once I wondered if I could
(And lately if I even should)...
I am a mother to my own, and as I crone
My daughter's own hourglass is full.
I see her beautify as a call
To give her every possibility

But then – she must know for herself – not for me.
Life is a gift that should be given free.
Yet sometimes, it comes at such a cost.
And many times beneath these many moons I have felt such loss.

So now, with witness all around
 I call this moment forth for me
I live now on as I am meant to be.
And the fear-beast that eats my birthright away
Can starve.
I now carve out from my life any wasted breath
I'm here for life and not for death.

So I feed myself first on the Love my Creator intended me.
Big and fat and full with it, I will share all that I have
And all what that will be.

– written November 8, 2003 for Teresa's Lunar Party, this seemed appropriate today, as I am reminded again of what culture would take and keep from us women if we are not vigilant.